At Sindhology, I digitized the last tape from the recording session we had last week. I took it back to my room and started organizing the pieces and checking to see if everything that should be there was. All of this took me into the afternoon, where I realized I was missing about 40 minutes of footage from one of the cameras. I would need to go back to Sindhology to use their DV deck to play the tape and see if the video is on there and did not record to the computer for some reason, or if there was a technical issue during the session. I’m guessing and hoping that I just messed up while digitizing, but I will need to wait a day to to find out.In the evening my friend Saqib dropped by and later I went to Hyderabad with Najib sahib. That was actually really nice. We both needed to get out for a bit. He drove us into town. I had some really good rasmallai and a chocolate shake. More than that, it was almost a surreal experience to sit so comfortably in an air conditioned car. It really hits home how big a divide there is between the experiences of people in nice cars and suvs, versus those on public transport or even motorcycles. It felt unbelievably luxurious to be in a comfortable car with air conditioning. I looked out the windows and saw the same world I had been coming to day after day, but I felt so removed from the pain and discomfort of it. When we passed the horrible sewage canal in Qasimabad, as I have so many times, I was in a fully enclosed car. I did not have to turn my head away from the sewage and hold my breath. I did not have the same courting with death at each turn feeling. I did not feel the heat, the dirt and the stench of being outside. I saw all of that, but I was not a part of it. It probably seems really silly, but it really was that shocking compared to what I have become somewhat accustomed to.Seeing people suffering from behind windows in an air conditioned car really removed me from most of the challenges that people face. On top of that, I was not driving either. That is the experience of wealthy people in Pakistan and certainly of politicians. They don’t experience so much of what their constituents go through. When you never have to smell the stench of the open sewers, why would you care about fixing them? When you don’t experience the pain of living as most people do, how can you represent them and work to improve their conditions?Honestly, I don’t want to experience all of this misery. It is really tough and I don’t have it as bad as most of the folks out there by a long shot. It reminded me that regardless of how difficult I feel that this work is, I really need to do it. As an artist, making a film that humanizes Pakistanis by showcasing our art, culture and beauty while supporting artists here through new collaborations is an important contribution. It is how I can use my specific skills to try and play a small part in contributing. I don’t want to live like this for even a moment. There is no romanticizing how uncomfortable and challenging it is to even taste what it is like for people here every day. I want to stay in the air conditioned car. I don’t want to smell the sewage, but I will try to add my positive bit to all of this.